Friday, January 12, 2007

In The Light

You all know these types of relationships. The ones where you can share life stories. Where you find out about not only the other person, but yourself. Where you can be brutally honest about anything and have no fear of offending. Where you can be yourself. These friendships are beautiful and priceless, and I consider myself blessed to have a few of these.

I once heard someone say that these types of relationships should be...just that—few. And they certainly shouldn't be had with those of the opposite gender, at least not until one is committed to a lifetime with that person.

And this made sense to me. I mean, after all, you don't want your secrets spilled out into the whole world. That's dangerous. And relationships can be so fickle, can't they? It seems to add up. It's safer to keep things clean and uncomplicated. But after a bit of wrestling I found this out about myself:

I don't agree.

I don't think that these types of relationships—the sharing, growing, real friendships—should be limited only a select few of a certain type.

And what about having these relationships with those of the opposite gender? What if this sharing somehow spawns an unwanted level of intimacy, or perhaps morphs into infatuation?

Again, I think the answer lies not in narrowing the sharing in the friendship, but instead broadening the reception and output of truth.

Because truth, in whatever form, belongs to God. This is why, even when I find myself with a friend discussing truths that seem completely unspiritual, I find myself growing closer to God. I wonder, can something that brings a person closer to God be wrong?

Maybe the problem isn't telling too many people, but telling too few people.

Everyone wears a mask.

Because we all have pain in our lives that no one knows about. And there is this fear that if we were to take off our masks, everyone would see how imperfect we really are.

So I wonder, what would happen if one day everyone decided to leave their masks hanging on the wall and walk out without them? What would happen if we would live without masks?

Well, first of all, I think it would be horribly disturbing. Think about it. Everyone you ever meet—with one glance you see all the pain they have ever had—that they have now. I don't think I could walk a block without bursting into tears. I don't think there would be a dry eye in the world. I'm seriously tearing up just thinking about it.

With one look you see everything. You see the jerk who always mouths everyone off, who can't keep a friend for two seconds, and know his father comes home every night drunk and beats his wife, while this kid can only watch powerless. You see the workaholic geek who can't spare time to say hello, and know that his parents wouldn't give him the time of day unless he did everything perfectly. Suddenly everyone knows that the peppy cheerleader had been sexually abused by her uncle. And every person you see has his or her own story. Every look brings more pain.

But then we realize that we are all the same. When the masks come off there is no hierarchy. We all have pain in our lives. Not only can we sympathize with what people are really going through, but some of us can even lift others up—let them have a real joy instead of cherishing the lies that are worn every day. And in a bit of time, everyone would be full of love—for God, for each other, and for themselves. The truth...well...sets you free. Joy in fellowship.

The action of living without a mask is something that John called "living in the light."

1 John 1:6,7— we are lying if we say we have fellowship with God but go on living in spiritual darkness. We are not living in the truth. But if we are living in the light of God’s presence, just as Christ is, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from every sin.


This idea used to scare me when I was younger. I was always told that when Christ comes, everything wrong that I had ever done would be revealed in plain sight for everyone to see. If every person could see at a glance all your sin and all your pain, it would hurt. Vulnerability always hurts.

But then I realized that we're all in the same boat. No one will be able to look at you in disgust, because they'll be so overcome by their own shame. And when we finally look around at the other people, we'll see clearly that we all have horrible wrong, and there will be no more shame. Because "there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus."

Everyone is twisted behind the mask.

So when we gave ourselves to Christ, he didn't give us a new mask to cover our disgusting selves again, but clears us up to reveal our true faces—the humans he created each of us to be. Call it spiritual dermatology.

But why wait until we get to heaven to realize that we're all imperfect? Why not bring heaven to earth right now?

This is why these sharing relationships are so...good. This is why they bring us closer to God. Because they are a part of living in the light. They bring heaven to earth.

So my proposal is that we not limit these relationships to a select few. This kind of fellowship is what God is all about. This is agape, and we need as much of it as we can have.

So let's do it. Let's take off the masks. We all need to be cleaned up anyway.

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3 Comments:

At 12:07 AM, January 14, 2007 , Anonymous Anonymous said...

radical, real living. I see that in Jesus' life. thanks, mi hermano, for sharing your thoughts and encouraging me to take off my mask.

 
At 4:55 PM, January 14, 2007 , Blogger Dan said...

I concur.

 
At 9:16 PM, January 21, 2007 , Blogger Nikki said...

i agree, mostly. Truth is the first priority, as a wise friend of mine had once said. you remember that poem i recited on the bus? "we wear the mask" it really is one of my truly favorites hence the knowing it so well. ;) Sometimes i wish we all didn't hide ourselves in something that is so accepted. But other times i'm glad that we do. Only because however because it would hurt even more to see all the pain- to actually "see" it. I wouldnt be able to pass even two people without bursting into tears asking God to save them all right then. But also without 'the mask' we step outside our comfort zone and have REAL relationships and REAL sympathey and love. Not some so-called stuff. It's hard sometimes, i bet it is. truth, i think, does bring some people closer to God because when they are honest with others that means they are also being honest with God.
Good insight Peter.

 

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